3.19.07

EPITOME OF MASCULINITY AWARD

That guy above might be one of the most bad ass men I have ever seen. He's the host of the show Man vs. Wild and his name is Bear. His friggin' name is Bear! C'mon now! How can you not be bad ass with a name like Bear. Here are some of his achievements...

He is a Karate black belt, served three years with the Special Air Service, a special forces unit of the British Army, during which time he broke his back in three places while parachuting over Southern Africa. Oh and he also climbed to the top of Mount Everest.

Now onto his show, Man vs. Wild. You have to see this. Its on Discovery Channel by the way. Basically this guy is dropped by parachute in some crazy fucking location with nothing but a knife. I saw the episode where he was dropped in the middle of the rain forest. He then jumped down waterfalls, chopped down trees, built a awesome little tut that would've probably taken me 2 weeks in a matter of hours. He then caught fish barehanded and built a crazy good raft and floated down the river, back to civilization. Now the best part is this show is done like an educational video. He explains to the viewer how to build rafts and what not. Thanks Bear...next time I decided to go wander into the middle of the rain forest with no supplies, I'll know which frog not to eat because of it being poisonous. It's absolutely hilarious to me. "When you get to a river like this...your going to want to make yourself a raft. Find these trees like this and simply chop them down." Then it cuts away and when it comes back theres the most perfect raft I've ever seen. This guy makes McGyver look like a retard. And thats why I'm giving him the first ever, "Epitome of Masculinity" award.