Die Hard Review

So here is my movie review for the new Die Hard flick. I absolutely HATED this film, to the point were I was going to leave the theater. It was probably the most over the top film I have ever seen. It has Bruce Willis launching cars off ramps at helicopters, jumping out of 90 mph cars and walking away fine, and a weird French guy who can basically "fly" with no explanation. The plot is a basic connect the dots action movie. Willis is the old cop who doesn't talk to his wife and kids and feels alone in the world. He is very old school and feels like he really hasn't accomplished anything. Heres the cool twist people! He saves a new school, technology geek and they are like total opposites...but guess what! Even though they might argue over what station to play on the radio, they become best friends, to the point where they would die for each other. The third act of the film also introduces Bruce Willis' daughter, who might actually be the strongest written character, but she just feels like an after thought. There is also a suprise cameo by Silent Bob as a uber hacker. They build him up the whole movie, and when he
is finally revealed, you feel like you got jerked off and didn't cum. It's basically the same thing as Wedding Crashers, but that movie gave you a awesome cameo by Will Ferrell. This tries the same thing but fails. The action sequences are decent, but way too over the top. In the first Die Hard, Willis is human. He can be hurt, and you feel for him as he runs barefoot over glass. In this film, he is a indestructible robot. You know whether he is shot, or thrown out of a speeding car, he will be absolutely fine. This might be one of the worse movies I have ever seen. I give it zero stars, I rather go and piss out kidney stones then have to re watch this shit. I hate it so much that I can't even talk to people about it. My hatred is so strong that I could honestly come to blows with someone that likes this film. Typing this up right now I'm getting filled with some much rage I'm about to go pull a Benoit. (Too soon)