Wednesday, April 01, 2009

4.1.09

Well I'm in jail. Apparently there are rules as to what you can and can't do for Aprils Fool Day. You are apparently not allowed to run into a airport dressed as a bearded Arab with a bomb strapped to his chest and scream "Jihad!". I yelled "April Fools!" like six times after the initial panic but I was still detained. Fuck this communist country... home of the free my ass!

Apparently a copy of the new "Wolverine" movie has leaked on the net a whole month before its theatrical release. That bad bizness right there. How do you let an uncompleted print of one of your companies biggest films get leaked that early? Early buzz is saying it is the suck and comparing it to the Ratner "X3".... thats bad. I hope this movie flops like all hell and makes "The Watchmen" look like a cash cow. I want this to be the final steak into the heart of superhero films. I'm so sick of these garbage films.... what happened to the days of Arnie, Stallone, and other roided freaks blowing shit up being the blockbusters? We transitioned from machismo gun fighting to superheroes. 

I sense another change coming soon. I feel the medium of comic books has just about been all tapped out... its time to draw inspiration from a new medium... But what? What is one of the most lucrative entertainment businesses with a built in fan base that shits all over comic book geeks? Why it would be video games. Video Game movies have long been taken as a joke handed off to god awful directors like Uwe Boll. As soon as a decent director takes on a well known franchise (Halo, Gears of War, Metal Gear Solid), you will see box office gold.

I always dreamed of making a Twisted Metal movie. Maybe the ship has sailed on that idea, as it would have been ideal to do around the time of "Fast and Furious", also when the franchise still had relevance. A tournament of hooked up cars with gun turrets strapped on the front roaming through a Gotham like city blowing up everything and everyone... and on top of that the people in the cars are interesting... like a serial killer clown.  I still think with a good trailer and at least one good actor this movie can make money. You have big action, cool cars, and superhero esque villians. The formula seems too good.

I love this 2 hour break I have in school... actually I hate it. I'm bored as all hell. Speaking of video game movies who remembers the "Super Mario Brothers" movie. Holy shit... that was the reason drugs were invented. I could imagine being told by a studio to write a screenplay for a live action Mario Brothers film... How the fuck? The story was actually clever... real clever. Someone wrote the shit out of that story to make something that made some sense...

How would I do a live action Mario film. I would actually make it a quirky art film. Mario would be a poor plumber living in a tight Brooklyn apartment with Luigi. He would be infatuated with a local girl named Daisy, and constantly berated by his evil boss, Mr. Cooper. He is timid and shy and afraid to go for the girl and stand up for himself. In his spare time he would draw comics in which he is "Super Mario" and saves the Princess Peach from the evil King Koopa. The film would jump between real time and this fantasy dreamworld of Mario's. Doing this comic would actually help Mario as a person and in the end he would stand up for himself and get the girl in both fantasy and reality. Thats just my take on it...

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