Criss Angel Levitates Me!

FUCK YOU!!!! Live right now I am watching the Magician of the Deuche bags Criss Angel and he is going to fucking levitate me thru the television. I'm hoping to float right into the fan and get a nice lawsuit on my hand.... So I just fired up the episode on my DVR and I will be watching it live with this blog and by the end I should be floating around.

The Affliction t shirt brand could stay in business based on the sales of Criss Angel alone... and why does he spell his name "Criss"? I remember when this guy was small time and used to run shows out of WWF New York here in Times Square. That was before he went out to vegas and became a multi-millionaire. His show used to be more "gothic" and less mainstream too. He was big into hanging himself from his skin on hooks and shit like that. Ok I cant take this I'm fast forwarding to when he levitates me... this damn show is an hour. Right now I'm feeling excited and quite frankly a little afraid. Im thinking he's going to use some sort of hypnosis. Ok here we go.....

HA HA HA HA! What?! He rambles on and on about seeing balloons and being lifted in the air and then closing your eyes. Then when he "snaps" you out of it he plugs his website and asks you to share your "experience".... This guy was designed to take take fat suburban Hot Topic wearing white chicks money.... lets look at some comments...

Criss, I'm still spread-eagled on my lounge room ceiling. Someone changed the channel while I was up there. How do I get down?

Criss i levitated gt worked

Criss i could feel myself rise off the ground and my feet just hanging there so thank you Criss.And you are a mindfreak you freaked my mind.Love ya.